(Weddign Recap) The Ceremony!

September 14, 2011 8 Comments

Finally the time came to walk down the aisle, exchange vows & rings, and officially become husband & wife!

From my spot out of sight in the balcony, I got a good look at the crowd gathering:

 

The chuppah translates to mean “covering” or “protection” and symbolizes the new home of the married couple.  It represents our desire for our home to be under the protection of God.  The marriage ceremony in Jewish faith cannot take place without a covering and four poles.

I remember standing at the top of the stairs, sneaking a peak and waving at friends who noticed me.  I listened to Wachet Auf lead our bridal party to their positions.  I heard the laughter and “awws,” telling me my niece successfully made her flower girl debut.

I popped my head phones in and half listened to the chorus of Lady Gaga’s Just Dance, to get me amp’d. Truth be told: I needed no help; my nerves turned over themselves, tears welled up in my eyes.  I heard the first chords of Pachelbel’s Canon softly hit the air, just as I learned to play it on the piano around age 10.

Mike began his way to the chuppah with his mom and dad on either side.

When I successfully memorized Pachelbel’s Canon way back when, I knew it would guide me to my groom in the future.  And here I was.
The music filled the air as I saw our wedding planner motion for me to start down the stairs.  Surprisingly, instead of don’t fall don’t fall don’t fall I thought This is it.

 This is it.
My wedding!
Our wedding.

My dad waited for me at the bottom, with the biggest smile on his face.  He whispered to me how gorgeous I looked.  Blinking back tears, beyond my veil I saw so many familiar faces, all in one place, all smiling back at me.  So much love. Amazing.

As I approached Mike, I saw, with out any doubt, the happiest expression to ever grace his face.  I wanted to kiss him right then and there! (I also love his brother’s face in the background)

Then I began the Seven Circles around my groom.  The seven circles represent my bond to him, just as the Teffelin straps are wrapped around a man’s arm.  Also the number seven nods towards the complexity of the creation of the world, just as marriage reenacts the creative process.  Interestingly, some couples share the seven circles, taking turns rotating around each other.  We went traditional and I tried not to get too dizzy and fall down as I went around him seven times. For those of you wondering, the rabbi counted for me.

In Jewish faith there are actually two parts to the marriage ceremony: Kiddushin (Betrothal) and Nisuin (Nuptials). “Both parts are introduced with the benediction over wine, the traditional symbol of joy and abundance. The bride and groom each take a sip of the wine for each.” {taken from The Jewish Wedding Guide}

 

During the Kiddushin we exchanged rings, by placing them on each other’s right index finger.  Apparently, long ago one used their right index finger to make a mark or signature. 

I’m honestly so excited right here.

During the Nissuin the rabbi recited seven blessings over us, love, friendship, and completeness amongst them.  
We shared our own vows here.  And let me tell you, I thought we had this one covered, but…
Well, using a stock “fill in the blank” with sentence starters, we both had the same 8 statements to make.  I added a little bit to mine and so did Mike.  We had our bridesmaid and close friend, Kathryn, read them both to ensure we were on the same wavelength and literal length.  Kat encouraged me to add a little more, but it didn’t feel natural.  
After I read my half page and felt pretty proud of myself.  Then seeing Mike pull out two pages just about made me gasp out loud.  He wrote and read the most heartfelt words.  I give him a lot of strife for not being “mushy.”  Not anymore!
(And so much for trying to be on the same page – I guess you can’t put a limit on love!)

Our rabbi read our ketuba and hand it to me.  I “own” it now. It’s mine, all mine!
Finally, after the second cup of wine, hot veil was lifted off my face.  
The last thing left to do: break the glass!
The breaking of the glass can be a reminder of the fragility of life and also an affirmation that in times of happiness there should be a touch of seriousness.  It signifies that we are still mourning over the destruction of the Holy Temple of Jerusalem.  It also serves as a reminder of the sanctity of marriage.  A broken glass cannot be mended. 
We shouted “Mazel Tov!” (good luck!)

and kissed!

We were married!
Husband & Wife.
beautiful.

{all photos taken by Studio Juno photography}
Filed Under: attendants, awesomeness, bridesmaids dresses, Carnegie Institute, chuppah, Judaism, kosher, officiant, recap, ring, the big day, traditions, veil

Prenuptial Counseling

January 3, 2011 5 Comments

We met with our Rabbi recently for round 1 of 3 of Prenuptial Counseling. This is the same Rabbi who converted me, so I feel completely comfortable with him. Because I studied extensively with him, many of the things he normally talks about with couples we already covered (like what it means to live in a Jewish home, & belonging to a synagogue).  So we brought up tons of questions we have about the ceremony.
And after only 30 minutes we ran out of things to talk about.  I’m not kidding.
He suggested that for next time we write down things we think of, and bring that list with us.

Here are a few main things we discussed:

The Sheva Berakhot (literally “the seven blessings”)
This is the real meat of the Jewish marriage ceremony.  These seven blessings praise G-d and wish joy upon the bride and groom.  They are said under the Chuppah and again after dinner.  What we need to decide is who will say these blessings. We are considering how to give the honor of saying this blessings to friends and family while not taking forever.  These blessings can be said and given out in a number of ways.

Way 1) Allow 7 different Jewish people to say the blessings in Hebrew followed by 7 people (of any religion) saying the translation in English.  This way takes a long time and adds about 20 minutes on to the ceremony, considering everyone has to get up from their seat, go up to the front, say their bit, then sit down again.  It’s nice, but is it practical?

Way 2) Allow 7 Jewish people to say the blessings in Hebrew, with the translation following – OR the Rabbi says the translations

Way 3) The Rabbi says it all, along with the traslations.

Remember, the Sheva Berakhot are said at two different moments.  It is possible to do it one way (have the Rabbi say it all) during the ceremony and then after dinner allow for more participation.

The Wedding Rings
As you know, I already designed and purchased my wedding ring.  But it’s not kosher. Literally.
See, the ring needs to be plain, without engraving, frills, or stones.  This is to show that the ring has no perceivable ending point. It is round and unending, just as the love between husband and wife. Also Mike needs to own the ring, so that when the rabbi asks “who owns this ring” which is about to be put on my hand, Mike can without a doubt say “I do.”  So my ring has stones and I own it.  Mike is going to buy me a plain, pretty band.  Interestingly there is no need for Mike to have a ring, but we’re modern and want to roll like that, so he’s getting one.  Plus we need a way for him to fend off the ladies once we’re married, right?!

My Shoulders
Without saying too much about my dress, I was worried my shoulders needed to be covered while under the Chuppah… or that I needed to be wrapped head to toe in fabric. (to be slightly more conservative, ya know?) Our Rabbi said so long as I am comfortable and not falling out of my dress, I am fine. 

Anyone have more questions for us to bring to the rabbi for Session Two of Prenuptial Counseling?

Filed Under: BlogBook, ceremony, chuppah, officiant, ring, traditions, wedding dress

7 Months away!

November 19, 2010 6 Comments

Here’s what we’ve been up to this month:
-Not one, but two catering tastings and a cake tasting!
-a phone planning session with premiere wedding consultant, Steve Kemble (in which I finally pick my color scheme)
-chose a day-of wedding planner
-rented a photo booth as our favors!
-thought we won a photography package, but then lost it — update: the previous photog we were working with before the fail went down, is back in the picture.  We will be paying full price, but love her and her work. Plus? We trust her 110%.

We’re working on:
-choosing a caterer (We set a personal deadline of Thanksgiving)
-bridesmaids dresses (no really, for real this time)
-florist arrangements (meeting on the 29th!)
-our engagement party (a bit delayed, but still a party!)
-joining our finances (we got life insurance, we’re legit)
-my hair and makeup (I have someone’s card – this is a step)
-my figure (keeping the weight off)

We’re kinda-sorta thinking about:
-invitations
-meeting with the rabbi soon

{image source}

Filed Under: BlogBook, bridesmaids dresses, cake, caterer, diet, favors, hair, officiant, photography

Always check first

October 4, 2010 6 Comments

My wedding band is ready for pick up! Simultaneously I received an email from our Rabbi who is officiating the wedding, with a detailed list of things to know, including this:

The first line mentions a “plain gold band” for a wedding ring.

So, oops on our part.
You might remember the ring I “commissioned” our jeweler to make, is not plain nor solid.
Mike’s cousin, Laurie, who leads the Hill Havurah pretty much already told us this – but we already ordered the ring at that time. (Hi Laurie!)

So what to do?
Well, duh, just get another!
I looked online at a few sites and found a plain white gold 2mm ring for less than $75.
No, that does not mean I am getting rid of my envisioned ring.
Yes, instead, that means I will have 2 wedding rings:  one plain white gold, the other my sapphire and diamond beauty!  The plain one will be used under the Chuppah, the other will be a gift of sorts.

I guess I learned that you should always check first before making any big purchases, wedding related.
However, I always wanted a diamond/sapphire band, so I’m not sure my decision would change!

I will be featuring more of the Rabbi’s list of wedding requirements in future posts (aka let’s see if I can follow directions).

Have you made any decisions and then come to find out checking first would save you time and money?

{PS:  Our friends Erik and Deanna currently live overseas in Kazakhstan, where Erik works for the Foreign Service/US Gov’t.  However, Deanna is already back in the states, anticipating are their little one’s arrival on Oct 22, and Erik will be back shortly.  I’m writing all this because they told me my blog is blocked in Kazakhstan!  I wanted to give them a state-side welcome and best wishes on the arrival of their baby! Hi guys!}

Filed Under: BlogBook, officiant, ring, wedding

Mispronunciation

August 25, 2010 11 Comments

Today’s story is brought to you by Krysten, a sweet, warm, fun woman from  After ‘I Do’.
She lives in River Falls Wisconsin with her husband, Dustin, and their zoo – 2 cats named Metro and Molly and a toy poodle named Monte (love it!). Dustin is a computer technician and she works part time at a clothing store called Maurice’s.  If that’s not enough she’s also a full time student with a major in sales and marketing!  In her spare time she enjoys being with friends and family, reading and writing and of course blogging.

 ————————

Hi all, I’m Krysten from After ‘I Do’. When Vicki asked me if I’d like to guest post about mishaps on my wedding day, I knew right away what I wanted to post about.


I was married nearly two years ago on September 27th, 2008 and it was a day to be remembered. The ceremony was so sweet with plenty of smiles and not a single tear shed by myself (despite the fact that I am a major crier). The cocktail hour was overwhelming with everyone wanting to talk to us but such a great time to see everyone. And the reception, well, that was just plain fun.

However, along the way to the big day there were mishaps, such as losing three wedding party members, finding out just days before the wedding that one of my readers wouldn’t be able to attend, finding out the day of the wedding that another reader didn’t want the job anymore and, oh yeah, the fact that my mom and I were in a car accident the day of the rehearsal.

Today, though, I’d like to talk about our wedding officiant Doug. Doug is a long time friend of my dad’s. They’ve known each other since high school and now they live in the same time and get together quite often to play cards, go boating or just hang out. When we found out that Doug could perform wedding ceremonies we knew that we wanted him to do ours.

In the months before the wedding, we worked with Doug to perfect our ceremony. We didn’t want a religious ceremony as neither my husband or I are religious. We found a book on how to construct a personal ceremony and eventually we figured out something that was perfect for us.

During the rehearsal we found on small kink in the ceremony: my husband’s last name (and soon to be my last name). You see, when my parents first met Dustin and I told them his last name my dad had a bit of a hard time with it. Dustin’s last name ends in STEIN and is pronounced STINE. However, my dad constantly wanted to say STEEN. Because of this, our officiant Doug had a bit of a difficult time remembering the right pronunciation. We rehearsed the ceremony multiple times and we kept saying, “STEEN Doug, like Frankenstein!” Eventually he seemed to get it and all was good.

Like I said, the ceremony went without a hitch. We figured out the situation with the readers and that went beautifully. Doug gave a wonderful speech about love and marriage and Dustin and I were able to give each other our personal vows without any problem.


Then, it was time to pronounce us husband and wife and to announce Mr. and Mrs. And that’s when it happened. Doug slipped back into saying STEEN instead of STINE. It could have been a big issue if I had been one of those brides. However, when multiple people, including my new husband and myself, all said, “It’s STINE Doug!” no one could help but laugh.


In the grand scheme of things it wasn’t a big deal of all and now I look back on that memory quite fondly and with a big smile on my face. It may have been a wedding mishap, sure, but it was one that I certainly didn’t mind and it’s part of what made that day fun, loving, special and silly.

Filed Under: guest blogging, officiant, wedding

VLOG 1

June 4, 2010 10 Comments

We got some important info yesterday, so I created my first VLOG to share it with you!
(er, please excuse the way I look after working a long day with children)

So here it is, my first VLOG:

Vlog #1! from Vicki Wxxxxxxxxx on Vimeo.

So what do you think?
What should I tackle first?!

Filed Under: officiant, VLOG, wedding

Stalemate

June 2, 2010 5 Comments

I. Have. Nothing. To. Write. About (that’s wedding related)

Here’s why:
1) We are still waiting to hear back from the rabbi as to whether or not he can officate our wedding on the date we chose
2) We already spoke to three caterers, one already gave us a (decent) proposal, the other two are in the works
3) I have a theme in mind, but was told by a co-worker that it was “overrated” and so I’m not divulging anymore until I have backup proof at how awesomely I can will pull it off
4) I am in “talks” with several sponsorship opportunities (translation: reviews and giveaways coming up, just getting my ducks in a row)
5) My wedding dress is hanging in our living room IN OUR LIVING ROOM, because the seamstress told me I was too early and we could come back in October

So, uh, yeah.  Time for me to find a new project with the wedding in mind.
It’s waayyy to early to think about flowers… or is it?
::ideas brewing, wheels turning::

What to do?
I’m “wedding bored”
Gimmie things to think about, please :)

Here’s one of my favorite photos since I have nothing more to write.

Filed Under: BlogBook, i complain because i can, officiant, wedding, wedding dress

We have a date! And a hang up….

May 17, 2010 6 Comments

Finally, we decided on The Carnegie Institute.
Finally, we put a hold on a date (June 19, 2011!).
(update: Glen Echo let me cancel my hold no problem)

Finally, it was all coming together.
And of course there’s a hitch in the plans.

I contacted the rabbi who we want to officiate and he said he’d get back to me after Memorial Day.  That is two plus weeks away and our hold is only for two weeks (I placed the hold on May 11).  Do we want only him to officiate and thus plan our date around his calendar?  Do we go ahead and book it and hope he can do it?  Do we hope can find someone just as awesome as him if he can’t?

Yes we have other dates in mind, but we have a preferred one.

If only there was an Officiant-Rabbi-Robot with an open calendar!

Filed Under: BlogBook, Carnegie Institute, officiant

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